Do you strive to have the perfect body, the perfect relationship, the perfect diet and wardrobe, the perfect job, and the perfect life? Have you worked tirelessly at your job—even during illness—so that you can further your career? Do you feel like no matter what, you’ll never be as smart, as attractive, or as rich as you’d like? If so, you are far from alone. External influences like social media, wellness culture, and hustle culture pressure us to strive toward unrealistic goals that leave us feeling anxious, burned out, and like we’re never enough. Isn’t it time we say, enough? 

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In this groundbreaking book, clinical psychologist and recovering perfectionist Dr. Paula Freedman-Diamond offers a clear path to help you move beyond toxic striving—the relentless pursuit of perfection, societal ideals, and external validation at the expense of your physical, mental, and emotional health—and instead turn inward for guidance. Using a combination of evidence-based tools and strategies grounded in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and intuitive eating, you’ll gain the insight needed to reconnect with your true values, reclaim your physical and mental health, develop unwavering self-compassion and confidence, and live by your own rules. 

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You’ll also find profound and practical guidance to: 

• Identify how and when you stopped trusting your own mind, body, and emotions—and started living according to society’s standards 

• Set goals that align with your personal values—instead of society’s expectations 

• Develop skills to defuse from restrictive and self-punishing thoughts, so you can be kinder to yourself 

• Learn how to be an observer of your emotions—rather than letting them control you 

• Stop beating yourself up for gaining weight, and view yourself and your body as more than just the perfect selfie 

• Set effective boundaries with anyone who makes you feel ashamed of yourself for how you look, how much you get done in your day, or anything else!